I'll find strength in pain and I will change my ways

I'm finally home from north carolina. Jesse got on the bus really early in the morning on Sunday and I've talked to him a few times, but he's in country now so I don't know when the next time I'll talk to him will be. Hopefully soon, because now that I'm home it's finally starting to sink in that he's gone. I can feel the big cry coming on. I just want to have some alone time to get it out of my system but I've been with my mom 24/7 so I haven't had the chance. I'm so excited to go to dino's on thursday with ange. I'm really looking forward to being with my friends and having a chance to breathe and just relax and not have to pretend to be anything. I just really miss Jesse...and I worry about him so, especially since he got punched in the face and can't see very well out of his left eye. It's such a long, terrible story and I really don't feel like typing it all out. I think I'm gonna go to bed, actually. I don't really want to do anything but sleep at this point.