So I was walking down the hall today and I was thinking to myself about someone, although I can't remember who at the moment, and I realized how nice they were. I mean, whoever this person was has always been nice. But for some reason I just decided that they were very nice. I don't know. Anyway, I was thinking about how much I liked them and at the same time the thought that I'm not that nice of a person sort of dawned on me. It sort of made me feel bad. Because I'm nice sometimes. But I have a bad temper and a short fuse and I can be a real jerk. So I'm not too sure why anyone likes me, to be perfectly honest. And if I died, I wouldn't blame people for going 'oh, well, she was kind of a bitch, so whatever.' because I'm pretty sure that even my own mother spends a good part of her time not liking me very much.
The other day I made a semi-stupid decision that I don't regret nearly as much as I probably should. And the day before that (which seems like a month ago, but really it was only a week and a few days ago) I made another bad decision that I likewise don't feel that bad about. Actually, I've reached an impressive level of not caring about my well being. It's not like I'm shooting up or swallowing fire or something. So like, it's not like it even matters. I'm just making a passive observation of the deterioration of my morals. That was a pretty sentence.
I got the job at Idlewild and signed the contract. I'm not sure how I feel about this. A.J. ships out with the air force on June 30. I'm also not sure how I feel about this.
I'm not really looking forward to this weekend. I'm sort of already over it.
I love the song "Green Eyes" by Coldplay. It makes me smile since I have green eyes.
I wish I could see Rufus Wainwright in concert. I wish he'd go on another tour. I wish he'd come to Pittsburgh when he DOES tour again.
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